The Old Account

There are some cases where you can hear the truth a thousand times and not really understand how to act in light of that truth. I think for me, money is one of those bugbears. I understand that Jesus said to store up treasures in heaven and that Paul McCartney said that money can't buy me love. But I think I'm not alone in being hesitant to invest my money into something that won't return directly to me. I check my bank account every month or so and if I've spent more than I made, then I get this tight uneasiness in my stomach.

Why worry? Harrison Ford made the observation, here paraphrased, that money is never an issue, unless you don't have it. And I've realized that to be true. Blessed to have a solid lower-middle class job in America (yes, I looked up "middle class" on Wikipedia), in my day-to-day living, money is absolutely an abstract. I don't spend anything ridiculous. I don't own any jetskis or horses. Yet I squirm about spending too much on a movie ticket or a new pair of shorts. I forget that, at least for the time being, all money really, truly is to me is a set of numbers on a computer screen that I try to make go up instead of down. I forget that I'm not in control of my life, that I could lose everything tomorrow and still have everything important.

Sometimes I think we think that it's a race to have balanced living a good life and having a pretty decent net positive balance at the end of the road, but you know what Scripture calls for us to have in our accounts at the end of life? No more than zero. So I should really embrace the idea that not every month has to end with a positive net balance -- God gives us money to use for His Kingdom work and to sustain us, not to hoard. There might have been a parable about that.

It's important to stay out of debt -- we do have an obligation to be good, faithful stewards of everything Christ has provided for us in our redeemed, purpose-driven lives, be that money or time or family or relationships. And we do have an obligation to model values like hard-work and self-control, as a witness and encouragement to others. And in 2 Thessalonians, Paul remarks on the importance of not burdening others: "For you yourselves know how you ought to follow us, for we were not disorderly among you; nor did we eat anyone's bread free of charge, but worked with labor and toil night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you, not because we do not have the authority, but to make ourselves an example of how you should follow us [...] For we hear that there are some who walk among you in a disorderly manner, not working at all, but are busybodies. Now those who are such, we command and exhort through our Lord Jesus Christ that they work in quietness and eat their own bread."

So yes, it's important to work and be faithful with the ledger. But I think I'm not the only Christian who really needs to let go of earthly treasures. I mean, it's come to the point where every time a ministry asks for money, they have to play some acoustic guitar music and a photo slideshow to guarantee donations. And I know that slideshows and acoustic guitar music are fine things, but I think ministries pretty much feel like they have to have those hooks to get Christians to donate. And there's a pretty well-known joke among waiters:

What's the difference between a Christian and a canoe? A canoe tips more.

Well, that's me, and it's a poor way of loving people who spend their days serving people like me. I think Christians should be big tippers. We should know how to take care of each other and how to show a little grace in practical ways.

I think people who read these thoughts will maybe think, that's a good thought, but it's not as if I should just shuffle off all my money to ease my guilty conscience. My problem is that I can't discern any good Kingdom investments or outlets for my money, so I'm saving it up. I don't think that's true at all -- I think every time you have an opportunity to give, whether it's to a homeless person, an international relief organization, a church, or your grandmother's birthday, your mind goes through two questions: should I give (yes or no) and do I want to give (yes or no)? And if our hearts say yes/no, then the cardial discrepancy depressurizes our stomach and gives us a tight, uneasy feeling. My biology might be a little off -- my point is that most of us probably experience no lack of opportunities for monetary investment in the Kingdom of God.

My other theory is that it's impossible to enjoy the reward of giving without doing it first. There are times where God grants us foresight of His blessing in something that we plan to do that makes us look forward to that particular endeavor -- marriage, children, joining a church, whatever. But it is so hard to want to give if we haven't started giving yet. Hence the camel and the eye of the needle. How can we see ourselves storing up treasures in heaven if we're sitting on a pile of earthly treasures? Isn't that the whole reason we haven't had our priorities straight to begin with?

Now I've done the easy part, which is write some words about something I should put into practice. I hope God grants me whatever it'll take for Step Two.